


Jack Frost Nipping at Your Nose

by swedish_furniture



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Hypothermia, actually not hypothermia though
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-15
Updated: 2013-02-15
Packaged: 2017-11-29 08:14:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,026
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/684769
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/swedish_furniture/pseuds/swedish_furniture
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s supposed to be a simple salt ‘n burn, which is why it turns out to be exactly the opposite.</p><p>“This is way worse than ‘a run of the mill spook’, Dean, you pissed off Jack Frost!”</p><p>“Jack Frost isn’t even real, Sam!”</p><p>“Obviously, he is, since he’s actively trying to turn us into popsicles.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Jack Frost Nipping at Your Nose

It’s supposed to be a simple salt ‘n burn, which is why it turns out to be _exactly the opposite_.

They’re in some little no-name town in the middle of nowhere, and there’s a body to burn in the middle of a lake, and, apparently, the ghost _does not approve of this_ , because _now_ , Sam and Dean are stuck in the middle of a blizzard.

_In July._

“It’ll be an easy salt ‘n burn, _Sammy_ , we don’t need to do anymore research on this stiff, _Sammy_ , “Sam snaps at Dean. 

Dean rolls his eyes at Sam from the corner of the cabin they’re holed up in.  He’s trying to light a fire out of some of the blankets he found in the bedroom, but every time it looks like they’re about to catch, a cold wind blows under the door and snuffs it out. 

“Don’t bitch at _me_!  How was I supposed to know it wasn’t just a run of the mill spook!” he shoots back.  Dean doesn’t want to say it, but they _might_ be a little fucked.  It’s cold as shit out, and Cas isn’t answering his prayers, so it doesn’t look like they have any angelic intervention in the works here. 

“This is way worse than ‘a run of the mill spook’, Dean, you pissed off _Jack Frost_!”

“Jack Frost isn’t even real, Sam!”

“Obviously, he _is_ , since he’s actively trying to turn us into _popsicles._ ”

“Need a little help there, kiddo?”

Sam and Dean both whirl at the new voice, to see _Gabriel_ , standing in the middle of the cabin. 

Gabe grins at them and snaps his fingers, and suddenly, the pile of blankets is a merrily crackling blaze, and both Winchesters are holding steaming mugs of hot chocolate.

Dean immediately drops his mug and goes for his ankle holster, but Gabriel just snaps his fingers again, and _the gun is now diamonds_. 

(The joke is lost on Dean, who looks like he’s trying to figure out if he can murder Gabriel with the diamonds anyway.)

“Looks like you pissed off an elemental trickster,” Gabe comments casually, “and I happen to know a little something about tricksters.”

“Wha-“ Dean starts, probably to say something like “WE DON’T NEED YOUR HELP YOU KILLED US A LOT OF TIMES OMFG GO AWAY”-even though Sam privately thinks they kind of _do_ need some help right now- but Gabriel just snaps his fingers a third time, and is _gone_ , just like that, leaving summer behind him.

Like, seriously, instead of howling wind and freezing snow, there’s sunshine and flowers and birds, and Sam and Dean just kind of stare at each other for a full five minutes before Dean says “what the f-“

That’s when Gabriel pops back into the room, holding onto a kid by his ear.  “Watch your language, Dean-o, there are _children_ present.  Thing One, Thing Two, meet Jackie,” he says, and the kid glares at him.

“My name is _Jack_.”

Gabriel cheerfully ignores him.  “So, _Jackie_ wants to say he’s real sorry about trying to freeze your balls off, because that would have been a tragedy, because your balls are a work of _art_.” 

(That last part is directed at Sam, who blanches in terrified confusion.)

Jack looks like he wants to do nothing of the sort, but Gabe gives him a shake and says “ apologize and we can keep this just between us two guys, and I won’t tell Big Red.”

So Jack looks up and says “I’m really _super_ sorry about trying to freeze you, even though you were going to _burn me to death_.”

Gabriel gives him another shake, tells him “at least that would have been warmer than drowning in a frozen lake”, and lets go of him.  Jack gives him the bitchiest bitch face Dean has ever seen- and his brother is _Sam_ \- and disappears in a swirl of snowflakes and the words “ _wind take me home”_.

“So.” Gabriel says conversationally.  “Jack Frost.  Nice enough guy, if a little young.  Also _not_ a ghost, if you were wondering.  Guardians are a whole different kettle of fish.”

“What the _hell_ is a guardian?” Dean snaps, glaring at Gabriel.  Gabriel, to his credit, isn’t fazed at all, just snaps Dean up another mug of hot chocolate.

Dean grumbles, hands the mug to Sam, and storms out of the cabin, telling them, “I’m going to need something stronger than hot chocolate.  By the time I get back, I want your new buddy _gone_ , Sammy.”

Sam thinks he should take offense to Gabriel apparently being his new buddy, because _he’s the one who remembers Dean dying on all those Tuesdays,_ but Gabriel just grins and waves goodbye as Dean slides into the Impala and drives away.

There a good three minutes of silence, before Gabriel claps his hands together and says “Well, this was fun and all, wanna have sex?”

Sam blinks, because there’s _no way_ he heard that right. 

Except he apparently _did_ hear that right, because Gabriel repeats himself.

“No, seriously, wanna get kinky, Gigantor?”

“You,” Sam begins slowly. 

“Me.” Gabriel replies.

“You killed my brother.  I _lost track_ of how many times you killed my brother.”

“I brought him back!” Gabriel says, _like that is a legitimate reason that makes everything okay now._

Sam is tempted to try stabbing him, even though it wouldn’t do anything.  Just for the general principle of it. 

“In my defense,” Gabriel tells him, after a pause, “ _you_ killed _my_ brothers too.”

And Sam has no retort to that, because, yeah, they kind of _did_.  And, yeah, Gabriel’s brothers were kind of dicks, but they were still Gabriel’s _brothers_. 

(Family’s still family, no matter how dysfunctional.)

“So was that a yes on the kinky monkey sex or not?” Gabriel asks, effectively ruining the moment.  “I can actually _turn us into monkeys_ for the kinky monkey sex, if that is a selling point for you.” 

“That,” says Sam, laughing despite himself, “is _not_ a selling point for me.”

Gabriel grins at him, and it’s so bright that Sam has to look away. 

“Oh, Samboni, you _have_ to let me broaden your world views.”

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Leviantines2013 on tumblr.


End file.
